You: Hi
Stranger: WOW YOUR HI LOOKS SO AWKWARD
You: REALLY!?
Stranger: Mhm
You: SHOULD I DELAY EPISODE 3 FOR 5453 YEARS?
You: Oh yeah , Im Gabe Newell
Stranger: What the fuck are you talking about
You: HALO!
Stranger: I'm a girl.
You: Im Gabe Newell
Stranger: Cool story bro
You: umm no
You: im Gabe Newell
Stranger: NOW THATS WHAT I CALL A COOL STORY BRO
You: no...
You: Im Gabe Newell


You: Hi
Stranger: hi
Stranger: m or f?
You: umm no
You: im Gabe Newell
Stranger: so u are a girl then:)>?
You: umm no
You: Im Gabe Newell
Stranger: boy?
You: umm no
You: Im Gabe Newell
Stranger: suck my balls:D
You: umm no
You: Im Spiderman
Stranger: im batman


You: Hi
Stranger: hey
Stranger: asl
Stranger: ?
You: umm no
You: Im Gabe Newell
Stranger: ok ok whats up?

You: umm no
Stranger: nice to meet u gabe
You: Im Gabe Newell
You: Im working at Valve Software
Stranger: how fun!
You: I want to delay Halo Episode 3 for 5 years.
Stranger: i bet


You: Hi
Stranger: Hey
You: Im Gabe Newell
Stranger: Im not!
You: I work at Valve Software
Stranger: i suppose that is cool
Stranger: i like valve
Stranger: L4D is fun
Stranger: oooh
You: Should i delay Halo Episode 3 for 10 years?
Stranger: half life 2
Stranger: you are fat
You: no, im a boomer
Stranger: you look like john lennon plus fat
You: Umm no
Stranger: with yo SPECTACLES
You: im Gabe Newell
Stranger: I get that
You: I will stop making games if people call me fat.
You: Or i will make more bugs and glitches
You: Or i will delay every game!
Stranger: well, im on ps3
Stranger: and i don't play many valve games


Stranger: smack me
You: Hi
You: *smack*
Stranger: smack me right in the mouth
You: *smacks right in the mouth*
Stranger: thank you
You: np
Stranger: im baddd
You: im Gabe Newell
Stranger: i need punishedddddd
Stranger: wtf is up with you gabe
You: I like delaying games.
Stranger: are you a sexy beast?
You: No, im fat.
Stranger: delay of game... because you are a quarterback!
Stranger: and you wait and wait and the 25 seconds goes by LIKE THAT
You: I work at Valve Software
Stranger: ohhhhh
Stranger: i work at biological systems software
You: I will delay Halo 3
Stranger: fat people can be sexy btw. if they have a cute face
You: I dont think so...
Stranger: well, you're wrong
Stranger: i'm trying to get fatter because i got laid more hwen i was fat
You: :O
Stranger: well, i wasnt THAT fat
You: this is me
You: http://forums.petrisimolin.com/media/6394/gabe1.jpg
Stranger: i was like chubby
Stranger: you are like dangerously fat
You: Should i eat more?
Stranger: if you want to have a cardiac infarction
You: Will that delay all my games?
Stranger: who cares about a game
Stranger: people who play games with their lives?
You: people make jokes about my fatness :(
Stranger: i'm still playing pacman
Stranger: i haven't progressed to the Super nintento yet
Stranger: i think it might be too super for me
You: Valve hates you.
Stranger: i dont care what a bunch of fat idiots who worry about what 15 year old boys do all day think
You: Hi
You: Im Gabe Newell
Stranger: your name is gabriel
Stranger: that's a beautiful name
You: im fat.
Stranger: i want to jiggle your stomach
Stranger: and see how much i can get it to shake
You: I might explode if you do that.
Stranger: gabriel... you need to stop being hard on yourself
You: Really?
Stranger: no one cares about your life, or what you do for a living
Stranger: or whatever halo 3 comes out
You: Im programming games.
Stranger: exactly, what a waste of a human being
Stranger: garbage men are more important that game programmers
Stranger: and deserve more respect
You: I sleep in garbage
Stranger: i have more respect for drug dealers than video game people
Stranger: at least drugs have a point
You: I lost all my money in conversations on the phone with Youtube.


You: Hi
Stranger: hi
Stranger: asl
You: ummm no
You: Im Gabe Newell
Stranger: m or f
You: umm no
You: Im Gabe Newell
Stranger: crazy
You: umm no
You: Im Gabe Newell
Stranger: fuck off
You: umm no
You: Im Gabe Newell

You: Hi
You: Im Gabe Newell
Stranger: m?
You: umm no
You: Im Gabe Newell
Stranger: male or female..
You: umm no
You: Im Gabe Newell
Stranger: iust fuck off


You: Hi
Stranger: hello
You: Im Gabe Newell
Stranger: what's your favorite band?
You: britney spears
Stranger: fuck you


You: Hi
Stranger: HUG FEST? YESSIR!
You: umm no
You: Im Gabe Newell
Stranger: COOL? DOES THAT MEAN YOU CAN'T HUG?
You: umm no
You: Im Gabe Newell
You: I work at Valve Software
Stranger: THEN STOP BITCHEN
You: Allright
You: *hug*
Stranger: WHY ARE YOU TELLING ME THIS?! i don't care.
Stranger: i love you.
Stranger: *hug* *hug*
You: umm no
You: Im Gabe Newell
Stranger: dude shut up
You: umm no
You: Im Gabe Newell
Stranger: k. no more hugs for you.
You: *cry*
Stranger: don't cry! you look fat when you cry!
You: i am fat.
You: but the main point is....
You: Im Gabe Newell
Stranger: YEAH DAS RIGHT
You: umm no
You: Im Gabe Newell
Stranger: and i was like whoooo da fuck is thaaaaat....
You: Should i delay Half Life Episode 3?
Stranger: bye... gabe newell


You: Hi
Stranger: You're a baby man baby
You: Im Gabe Newell
Stranger: BABY
Stranger: BABY
Stranger: I'm game nowal
You: STFU JUSTIN BIEBER
Stranger: Just so fat
Stranger: NO
Stranger: THIS WAS NOT HIM
Stranger: I MEAN IM NOT HIM
Stranger: IM A MALE
You: GET OUT OF MY EARS
Stranger: PLEASE
Stranger: I'D LOVE TO
Stranger: BUT ITS NOT POSSIBLE
Stranger: LUDACRIS SAYS NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Stranger: Let's dance.
You: umm no
You: Im Gabe Newell
You: I work at Valve Software
Stranger: Do you want to pretend to be Ringo?
Stranger: Don't sit on those cables, man
You: and now that you Baby'ed me , i will delay Episode 3
Stranger: Thank god!
Stranger: It will suck anyway, huh!
You: I will stop updating L4D2
Stranger: It should never even exist.
Stranger: I love you more than ever, Gabe
You: Im a boomer
Stranger: I can see that.
Stranger: Where are you from?
You: Valve Software
Stranger: You here for some hot hot webcam action???
Stranger: From brazil right?
You: umm no
You: Im Gabe Newell
Stranger: Or what the hell
You: Bieber?
You: did u die?
You: oh yeaah
You: that bitch is dead
You: the world is saved
Stranger: Whoa
You: Oh no ur here
Stranger: I'm Reanu Keeves
You: umm no
You: Im Gabe Newell
Stranger: I'm gonna disconnect now
Stranger: YOu're kinda boring
You: umm no
Stranger: BORING AS IN FAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIL
You: Im Gabe Newell


You: Hi
Stranger: hi
You: Im Gabe Newell
Stranger: Im Ashley Martel
You: I work at Valve Software
You: Should i delay Episode 3?
Stranger: yesssss
You: umm ... Im Gabe Newell
Stranger: umm.. im Ashley Martel?
You: no no no no no
You: ur missing the main point
You: Im Gabe Newell
Stranger: i dont believe you
You: i dont believe you
Stranger: so youre like 50?
Stranger: thats hot
You: Im fat
Stranger: so cutwe
You: im 48 by the way
Stranger: same thing
You: that was an mistake to call me 50
Stranger: i am sorry sir
You: now i will delay all valve games
Stranger: why
You: I like delaying.
Stranger: why
You: You wont get a Xmass present which is made by valve
Stranger: i want a pony for christman
Stranger: christmas*
You: Valve doesnt make ponies
Stranger: exactly


Stranger: asl.?
You: asl.?
Stranger: 15 m uk
You: 15 m uk
Stranger: where you from.?
You: where you from.?
Stranger: :)
You: :)