alias $c1 { return $+($chr(3),07,$1,$chr(3),) } 
alias $c2 { return $+($chr(3),12,$1,$chr(3),) } 
alias $c3 { return $+($chr(3),04,$1,$chr(3),) }

on *:text:!rsjoke:#:{  
  set %rsjoke $rand(1,64)
  if (%rsjoke == 1) { notice $nick $c1 You know you've spent too much time on runescape when: You consider 500k poor }
  if (%rsjoke == 2) { notice $nick $c2 You know you've spent too much time on runescape when: You leave Rune armour after a kill because it's not worth the space it 
  takes in your pack }
  if (%rsjoke == 3) { notice $nick $c3 You know you've spent too much time on runescape when: You can 3-hit Terror_nisse }
  if (%rsjoke == 4) { notice $nick $c1 You know you've spent too much time on runescape when: Someone can only get your attention by calling you by your RS name 
  instead of your real name }
  if (%rsjoke == 5) { notice $nick $c2 You know you've spent too much time on runescape when: Your dreams all revolve around runescape }
  if (%rsjoke == 6) { notice $nick $c3 You know you've spent too much time on runescape when: You call up your friends and ask them if they want to help you kill some 
  people in the woods }
  if (%rsjoke == 7) { notice $nick $c1 You know you've spent too much time on runescape when: You go crazy if you have to spend more than 24 hours away from the game }
  if (%rsjoke == 8) { notice $nick $c2 You know you've spent too much time on runescape when: Your history essay is on the history of runescape }
  if (%rsjoke == 9) { notice $nick $c3 You know you've spent too much time on runescape when: You go hunting with a sword instead of a rifle. }
  if (%rsjoke == 10) { notice $nick $c1 You know you've spent too much time on runescape when: It doesn't matter if you have real money as long as you have money in 
  the game }
  if (%rsjoke == 11) { notice $nick $c2 You know you've spent too much time on runescape when: You set your alarm to wake you up after 5 seconds of rest }
  if (%rsjoke == 12) { notice $nick $c3 You know you've spent too much time on runescape when: You buy a computer for every room in the house so you can play RS where 
  ever you are }
  if (%rsjoke == 13) { notice $nick $c1 You know you been playing rs too much when: When you attack an old lady, you claim that you are training. }
  if (%rsjoke == 14) { notice $nick $c2 You know you been playing rs too much when: When you pick up a penny, you wonder why it won't respawn. }
  if (%rsjoke == 15) { notice $nick $c3 You know you been playing rs too much when: When you the king black dragon looks dark green too you. }
  if (%rsjoke == 16) { notice $nick $c1 You know you been playing rs too much when: When you pk someone, they get banned. }
  if (%rsjoke == 17) { notice $nick $c2 You know you been playing rs too much when: When they have to take off a digit off you combat level. }
  if (%rsjoke == 18) { notice $nick $c3 You know you been playing rs too much when: When Terror_nisse can't attack you cause his level is too low. }
  if (%rsjoke == 19) { notice $nick $c1 You know you're too much of a noob when: A level 3 looks red to you. }
  if (%rsjoke == 20) { notice $nick $c2 You know you play too much runescape when: Andrew says to you go away plz dont kill me. }
  if (%rsjoke == 21) { notice $nick $c3 You know you been playing runescape too long when... You go to work saying "buying pickaxe, 1gp yell 000". }
  if (%rsjoke == 22) { notice $nick $c1 You know you been playing runescape too long when... You are at gunpoint and you say "go ahead, I'll only drop five bucks". }
  if (%rsjoke == 23) { notice $nick $c2 You know you been playing runescape too long when... There's two permanent hollow spaces on your computer chair. }
  if (%rsjoke == 24) { notice $nick $c3 You know you been playing runescape too long when... Your clicking finger is the strongest muscle in your body. }
  if (%rsjoke == 25) { notice $nick $c1 You know you been playing runescape too long when... You go to school and realize that you forgot your pickaxe. }
  if (%rsjoke == 26) { notice $nick $c2 You know you been playing runescape too long when... Andrew goes crazy trying to create a monster that you can't kill. }
  if (%rsjoke == 27) { notice $nick $c3 You know you been playing runescape too long when... The servers crash when you log on. }
  if (%rsjoke == 28) { notice $nick $c1 You know that you are a noob when... A chicken 3-hits you. }
  if (%rsjoke == 29) { notice $nick $c2 You know that you are a noob when... An imp's level is written in red. }
  if (%rsjoke == 30) { notice $nick $c3 You know that you are a noob when... You spend your first 1k gp on goblin armour. }
  if (%rsjoke == 31) { notice $nick $c1 You know that you are a noob when... You brag that your "main" has a dragon 2-hander. }
  if (%rsjoke == 32) { notice $nick $c2 You know that you are a noob when... You report someone for maging on your goblins. }
  if (%rsjoke == 33) { notice $nick $c3 You know that you are a noob when... Your "get rich plan" is to pick bananas and sell them to Luthas. }
  if (%rsjoke == 34) { notice $nick $c1 You know that you are a noob when... Luthas files for bankruptcy. }
  if (%rsjoke == 35) { notice $nick $c2 Q: Why did the noob cross the street? A: Because he couldn't teleport yet. }
  if (%rsjoke == 36) { notice $nick $c3 You know your a noob when: Chickens are red to you. }
  if (%rsjoke == 37) { notice $nick $c1 You know your a noob when: A guy offers you full steel for free and you say "no thanks i have full bronze its better". }
  if (%rsjoke == 38) { notice $nick $c2 You know your a noob when: you know lumbridge castle like the back of your hand. }
  if (%rsjoke == 39) { notice $nick $c3 You know your a noob when: chickens are a challenge for you. }
  if (%rsjoke == 40) { notice $nick $c1 You know your a noob when: men lvl 9 are WAY ouy of your reach. }
  if (%rsjoke == 41) { notice $nick $c2 You know your a noob when: youve only cooked 1 out of 4578 raw chicken the rest are burnt. }
  if (%rsjoke == 42) { notice $nick $c3 You know your a noob when: you keep burnt meet and try to sell it. }
  if (%rsjoke == 43) { notice $nick $c1 You know your a noob when: you have full tin. }
  if (%rsjoke == 44) { notice $nick $c2 You know your a noob when: you cant even mine tin and copper. }
  if (%rsjoke == 45) { notice $nick $c3 You know your a noob when: you have your own respawn spot for were you die. }
  if (%rsjoke == 46) { notice $nick $c1 You know your a noob when: you brag to your friends about an iron dagger and a medium bronze helmet. }
  if (%rsjoke == 47) { notice $nick $c2 You know your a noob when: the farthest from lumbridge youve been is still in lumbridge. }
  if (%rsjoke == 48) { notice $nick $c3 You know you play too much when: packages are sent to you in your runescape name. }
  if (%rsjoke == 49) { notice $nick $c1 You know you play too much when: you rename youre street varrock. }
  if (%rsjoke == 50) { notice $nick $c2 You know you play too much when: you smith noobs full rune just to see them cry when they cant wear it. }
  if (%rsjoke == 51) { notice $nick $c3 You know you play too much when: they made a village named after you. }
  if (%rsjoke == 52) { notice $nick $c1 You know you play too much when: you go to a corner store and try to sell a bronze square shield saying its worth 23 gp. }
  if (%rsjoke == 53) { notice $nick $c2 You know you play too much when: you walk around saying "Selling my lunch Shout 123 to buy". }
  if (%rsjoke == 54) { notice $nick $c3 You know you play too much when: you prospect all of the rocks in town looking for coal. }
  if (%rsjoke == 55) { notice $nick $c1 You know you play too much when: you want a new computer so you find out how much addymentite you need. }
  if (%rsjoke == 56) { notice $nick $c2 You know you play too much when: you consider a rune one instead. }
  if (%rsjoke == 57) { notice $nick $c3 You know you play too much when: You have 23 other guys because your guy is too good. }
  if (%rsjoke == 58) { notice $nick $c1 Your guy is too good when.. You cant even fight Terror_nisse in wildernes lvl 48. }
  if (%rsjoke == 59) { notice $nick $c2 Your guy is too good when.. theres an option added for you called bow down to $nick $+ . }
  if (%rsjoke == 60) { notice $nick $c3 Your guy is too good when.. you mine rune with your hands. }
  if (%rsjoke == 61) { notice $nick $c1 Your guy is too good when.. you smith with your hands as well. }
  if (%rsjoke == 62) { notice $nick $c2 Your guy is too good when.. you can make a fire just by shaking your hands around. }
  if (%rsjoke == 63) { notice $nick $c3 Your guy is too good when.. when you log in servers crash. }
  if (%rsjoke == 64) { notice $nick $c1 Your guy is too good when.. andrew bannes you for being too good. }
}
}