1:05 the TS for 536 Crew Missing is moving
1:14 the text for the other side ".....survived" doesn't fade fast enough
also the font is kind of hard to read
1:17 spelling mistake for I'll
1:24 some jitteriness in the video, dunno if this can be fixed
1:24 the color for High and School should be lighter since the kanji is slightly discolored
1:47 font for the karaoke is very plain, missing font? 
http://img208.imageshack.us/my.php?image=snapshot20070405230508rf7.jpg
2:50 title screen font is kind of small and hard to read. Also fades in a bit late, blur the edges with \be maybe?
3:33 you use onee-sama with a hyphen but did not in the title screen
3:54 sub should stay onscreen longer
5:38 note fades way too soon to be read
6:22 better tl. She says tian-tsai (Chinese sounding word) but it means genius
6:29 "He" should be "Eh"
7:03 "Ah... b-but..." use ellipses?
8:40 instructing spelled wrong
8:45 sub fades too soon
9:44 sub fades too soon
11:10 nepotism is fitting of the situation. favoritism is a better word
11:26 onee-sama need upper case O
14:15 better tl? also "my" should be "me"
19:28 "Show them..." add ellipses
19:42 "Show them all..."
19:43 "how good..."
20:43 "What's she trying to do?!" add an exclamation
20:51 subs appears too late, should come in with the first ba
also, i think this needs better tl. The ba...ba...ba... refers to baka, not 
"you're", also, use lower case y after first You
21:09 lower case s after first She
22:28 sub fades too soon
23:11 don't need "Oh!" since it fades too soon anyway