FACADE STAGEPLAY
Sat Jun 23 21 14 00 2007

GRACE
Trip, when are you going to get rid of this?

TRIP
What, Grace... this?

(Andrew knocks on the front door.)

(Andrew knocks on the front door.)

GRACE
Yes, you know how I feel about -- (interrupted)

TRIP
Oh, he's here!

GRACE
What?! You said he's coming an hour from now!

TRIP
No, he's right on time!

GRACE
Trip...!

(Trip opens the front door.)

TRIP
Andrew!! 

TRIP
Hey! It's been too long, man!   How are you doing, -- (interrupted)

(Andrew kisses trip.)

TRIP
Oh... you're doing the European-style greeting...  

(Andrew kisses trip.)

TRIP
 we just got back from a trip to Italy, but the men only did that with women... generally... but, um...

(Andrew kisses trip.)

(Andrew kisses trip.)

TRIP
Well come on in...

TRIP
Uh, let me go get Grace...

TRIP
(unintelligable arguing) -- (interrupted)

GRACE
No, no, here we are!

GRACE
Andrew, 

GRACE
Hi!  How are you?  Oh god it's been such a long time!

TRIP
That's funny, I said the same thing!

(Andrew hugs trip.)

GRACE
By the way, you look wonderful!  

(Andrew hugs trip.)

GRACE
Well, make yourself at home, come on in! -- (interrupted)

(Andrew kisses trip.)

TRIP
Oh, uh, ha ha!  You're kissing me!  You're so funny!  

(Andrew kisses trip.)

GRACE
Oh... ha ha ha...

(Andrew kisses trip.)

GRACE
Well, come in, make yourself at home...

(Andrew kisses trip.)

TRIP
Huh, I'll close the door.  

TRIP
Heh heh,    Andrew,  -- (interrupted)

PHONE
** RING **

(Trip closes the front door.)

GRACE
Oh, I'll get it --

TRIP
No, no no no, our friend's here, we can let the answering machine get it. -- (interrupted)

(Andrew kisses trip.)

PHONE
** RING **

TRIP
uh... ha heh heh...

GRACE
uh...

TRIP
(nervous coughing)

PHONE
** RING **

(Andrew kisses trip.)

PHONE
** RING **

TRIP
uh... uh...

ANSWERING MACHINE
** click **

ANSWERING MACHINE
You've reached the fabulous new home of Grace and Trip.  Leave us a message!

(Andrew kisses trip.)

ANSWERING MACHINE
** beep **

ANSWERING MACHINE
Travis, are you there, it's your mother, I haven't heard from you and Grace in a while,

TRIP
Okay,    Andrew,  you know what?  I think you should leave.

ANSWERING MACHINE
I'm just calling to find out if you've settled in to your new apartment, that's all...

(Trip opens the front door.)

TRIP
We'll be fine -- just go.

(Trip closes the front door.)

ANSWERING MACHINE
Give me a call if you're not travelling, I know you're travelling a lot these days.

ANDREW
YOU MAKE ME HORNY.

ANSWERING MACHINE
Okay, that's all, bye Travis.