on *:op:#: {
  inc %opcount
  if ($opnick == $me) {
    inc %op 1
    msg $chan 12Yay! I love ya for the 4OP12, $nick $+ ! 10Don't I just own? I have been 4opped10 %op times! To keep me ooped type /cs access $chan add $me 5 (or higher).
  }
}
on *:help:#: {
  inc %hopcount
  if ($chan == #b0ts) { halt }
  if ($hnick == $me) {
    inc %hop 1
    msg $chan 12Yay! I love ya for the 7HALF-OP12, $nick $+ ! 10Don't I just own? I have been 7half-opped10 %hop times! To keep me half-oped type /cs access $chan add $me 4
  }
}
on *:deop:#: {
  inc %dopcount
  if ($chan == #b0ts) { halt }
  if ($opnick == $me) {
    inc %dop 1
    msg $chan 12 $+ $nick $+ , did you know your really mean?! 10I have been 4deopped10 %dop times! :'(
  }
}
on *:dehelp:#: {
  inc %dhopcount
  if ($chan == #b0ts) { halt }
  if ($hnick == $me) {
    inc %dhop 1
    msg $chan 12 $+ $nick $+ , did you know your really mean?! 10I have been 7dehalf-opped10 %dhop times! :'(
  }
}
on *:voice:#: {
  inc %voicecount
  if ($chan == #b0ts) { halt }
  if ($vnick == $me) {
    inc %voice 1
    msg $chan 12Yay! I love ya for the 2VOICE12, $nick $+ ! 10Don't I just own? I have been 2voiced10 %voice times! To keep me voiced type /cs access $chan add $me 3
  }
}
on *:devoice:#: {
  if ($chan == #b0ts) { halt }
  inc %devoicecount
  if ($vnick == $me) {
    inc %devoice 1
    msg $chan 12 $+ $nick $+ , did you know your really mean?! 10I have been 2de-voiced10 %devoice times! :'(
  }
}