: : MAD CAP'N TOM : :

He has POLICIES
He has EXPERIENCE
He has A DUCK ON HIS SHOULDER


POLICIES
* Cutlasses fer all
* All YUSU officers t'be trained in swordfighting
* Cannon on Central Hall pointed at th' Vice-Chancellor's house.
* Plundering o' Lancaster University
* Discount rum in all bars
* Hammocks at Union Senate for easier napping
* Society budgets t'be paid in gold doubloons
* Demolish half of Goodricke-Vanbrugh bridge, leave the rest as a long plank fer us t' be makin' the uni admin walk
* Pharmacy on campus

EXPERIENCE
* Only candidate t'be interviewed on Newsround
* Five gold runs on Blockbusters
* Runs the British part of Talk Like A Pirate Day
* Former society chair (and Great Uncle Bulgaria)
* Has released a charity single

DUCK ON SHOULDER
* is called Brian